The first thing I love about Canada’s finest newspaper is Margaret Wente. She is so rad and smart. She can really write. And she really makes you think. More than that, she makes you really cherish thinking. Sometimes, after I finish reading a Wente column, It’s like I’m all filled up. It’s like I’m totally saturated and she’s in me and I’m shaking with light.
Even now, just thinking about it, I shiver a little.
She’s their mascot. I mean, without Wente, where would their brand be?
Thank God for Wente. And thank Wente for The Globe and Mail.
The second thing I love about the Globe, is the horoscopes. They don’t mess around. They take the reading of the stars very seriously, and so do I. If I can’t find a National Post around, then I’ll go straight to The Globe and Mail horoscopes.
Just clear your browser cache and search “Globe and Mail” on Google and you’ll see how serious they are.1 “Horoscopes” shows up on Google on the same level as “Report on Business” and “Sports.”
And the Google Page Rank of the Horoscopes page is the same as the News page! Wow! Right? And sports! So amazing.
It all really tells you how much they care about sports. And news. Respect.
And they don’t just do a daily horoscope. They also have the “lookahead” and the “New Year’s” reading. And they always nail me! Here’s the Globe nailing me soooo right today, August 12th (Taurus!):
By all means aim high, by all means set yourself targets, but don’t make them so far ahead of what you are capable of that failure is more likely than not. You don’t have to be perfect – you’re perfect just the way you are.
Oh those clever publishers. “Horoscopes” is a subsection of “Globe Life,” just like “Health & Fitness,” and “Relationships.” Which goes to show you how much they care about these things too. Respect.
And you have to hand it to the astrologer. Sally Brompton is a total pro. The Globe is lucky to have her. She’s a genius, just like Wente: “Sally Brompton is a professional astrologer … [who] trained and worked with the world-renowned astrologer Patric Walker for many years until his death in 1995 when she succeeded him.” 2
She doesn’t just work for The Globe and Mail, of course. She’ll also work directly for you. Just give her a call, and give her some money, and she’ll read your stars and give you a full write up. That’s probably how a lot of writers for The Globe and Mail do work on the side. See? Smart!
Anyway I’m really glad The Globe and Mail has Brompton and the other excellent writers. And you know who you can thank for that? You can thank the loyal readers like me and the advertisers that pay to get in our eyeballs. Advertisers like IBM keep the lights on at The Globe so they can keep getting in our eyeballs. And I say, “get in my eyeballs!” Because together in partnership, with IBM’s money, and my eyeballs, we’re going to keep real Canadian news alive. Not that Gawker crap.
I mean, without Wente, where would their brand be?
IBM plus eyeballs, equals strong, traditional Globe and Mail journalism. And that’s why I half love you IBM. Get in my eyeballs!
The third and final, full, thing I love about The Globe and Mail is how much I trust them. Did you know that “The Globe and Mail offers the most authoritative news in Canada, featuring national and international news?” I didn’t know that until they told me. And wow, are they relentless about saying stuff. That’s just how good they are. And it’s not just this important reporting that I admire.
I also trust their editorial. It’s really the whole Globe narrative. Love Harper. Love Hudak too. You’ll get them next time, buddy.
Love The Globe and Mail. Thanks IBM.3
- Try this at home. Clear your browser and search history. Search for “Globe and Mail.” Try alternate search engines. Tell me your results. ↩
- Taken from the About Sally page on her website that the Globe and Mail links to. http://www.sallybrompton.com/pages/about_sally.htm ↩
- http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/horoscopes/august-12-your-daily-horoscope/article19957249/ ↩